~ Delightfully Delirious ~

2006-07-27T21:30:00.000+08:00

i dunno if it's a good or a bad thing...that i feel more affected by the lebanon war than the cha-cha

2006-05-02T00:38:00.000+08:00

little girl by quiapo church

I have an LJ!

2006-05-01T23:31:00.001+08:00

Congratulate me! Add me! Read me! Time for something new...

http://shutterhappy.livejournal.com

Today is All Souls' Day

2005-11-02T20:30:00.000+08:00

Today is All Souls' Day. A lovely reminder that one day, we shall all die. And when that happens, we will leave all the miseries of this world and live the life that we were meant to live--eternal life, with which comes eternal hapiness. Or at least I'd like to believe so.

___________________________________

Today's piece of trivia: Remember the yard guy Marissa had an affair with in The OC Season 2? Well, Jesse Metcalfe, tried out for that role, but he didn't get in. Instead, he got the role of John, the yard guy desperate housewife Gabrielle has an affair with. :) Galing noh! Imagine if he did get the first role he auditioned for. Sayang!

___________________________________

One week and a half left before I go back to school. I really don't want to. I'm not sick of not going to school yet. I still have a lot of things to do. Like finish "Lost" Season 2. And go to Makati Med to have, well, something done. And lose weight. But most of all, I still have to finish rereading HP and the Goblet of Fire before the movie comes out.

Wheeeeeee. I'm so excited. Can't wait! (for Harry Potter, not school)

http://harrypotter.warnerbros.com/gobletoffire/

40,000 thoughts running through my head

2005-10-28T01:07:00.000+08:00

Tonight I can write the saddest lines... my parents have locked the door to their room with the precious sleeping pills. So now I stay awake. Wide awake. And outside the rain is pouring.

But it's okay! Because I am in a good mood! In a good, thinking mood! I'm excited to spend Halloween with my family and little cousins--especially Cheska, the epitome of cuteness.

Aww...cutie pie.

_______________________

I took this from wikipedia. They really got everything there!

Unrequited love is love that is not reciprocated, even though reciprocation is desired. This can lead to feelings such as depression, anxiety, and mood swings such as swift changes between depression and euphoria. The experience of being in unrequited love is often one of limerence. Unrequited love can result in obsessive behaviour or transform into hostility to the object of desire (emotional rejection), leading to behaviour such as stalking. This has often caused the afflicted person to be further victimised by name-calling (such as "pervert"). However, unrequited love has also been the inspiration for and topic of many great works of art. Although being in unrequited love can be a torture, it can simultaneously be a source of great joy, and even provide the lover a sense of satisfaction at having somebody to love, even though that love is not returned. This may be seen as "worth" the emotional duress.Although unrequited love can last a very long time -- many years, or even decades -- the lover's feelings usually reach a breaking point as they continue to deepen. The love typically ends either when the lover receives reciprocation from the loved (consummation), such feelings subsides (starvation), acknowledgement that their feelings will never be returned leading to suicide, or the person channels their devotion towards another, more reciprocative, object (transformation).

Continued...

Around the same time, poet Abraham Cowley writes of the emotion (Anacreon, vii. Gold.):

"A mighty pain to love it is,
And 'tis a pain that pain to miss;
But of all pains, the greatest pain
It is to love, but love in vain."

And then, of course, there is Charles Schultz; his Peanuts character Charlie Brown suffers from unrequited love for the Little Red-Haired Girl, and Brown famously notes in one strip:

"Nothing quite takes the taste out of peanut butter like unrequited love."

Obsessed Completely

2005-10-24T12:55:00.000+08:00

With regards to my attempts in engaging in a technological detox, I have failed miserably. (understatement) My obsession for television has certainly risen to great heights for I find myself constantly downloading episodes of "Lost," (and about to download "Friends" season 10) I have finished watching the OC season 2 as well, and currently, I am in episode 7 of Desperate Housewives.

I really don't know what to do with myself anymore. Sembreak has caused me to be at the peak of my bum-dom. I should probably go to TV-rehab if there's such a thing. Yes, it's that bad that I've been totally M.I.A. with the rest of the world. Anyway... I just hope I'm responsible enough not to let this follow through to the next sem.

Congratulations! You are Bree Van De Kamp, the Martha Stewart on steroids, whose family is about to mutiny.
Which Desperate Housewife are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

On Current Events...

2005-10-23T23:34:00.000+08:00

As I was watching "Catwoman" on HBO last night, I though to myself, Halle Berry is sooo lucky...

a) she was Miss America for the Miss Universe Pageant,
b) she is soo beautiful and soo hot,
c) she was the first black woman to win an Academy Award for Best Actress in a Leading Role
d) she got to be with Hugh Jackman in "Swordfish,"
e) she got to be a Bond girl. And the list goes on.

*dreaming* I wonder what life would be like as Halle Berry.

Anyhow...Speaking of Bond, check out the new James Bond:

Yes, my dears, Bond is Blonde. (eew! blech!) My twin Ana said it perfectly-- they (the producers, casting people...whoever!) got the looks right, and he's got the accent+nationality, but...this guy after one of the handsomest, most dashing men in the planet, Pierce Brosnan? And more importantly...a BLONDE BOND?? This is an outrage! Please, moviemakers, please, dye his hair.

Hmm...Howell. I guess we better wait and see.

Reflections Of A Sem Gone By

2005-10-22T01:24:00.000+08:00

I think life is a puzzle, and I don't just mean it's puzzling-- I think, it is an actual puzzle. What I mean is, we go on living life looking for the pieces that fit, and most of the time, we don't even really have to look because the pieces are right there in front of us. We just have to pick carefully, sort them out.

In the past four months of my college life, I have found so many pieces of my own life puzzle. One piece that fits perfectly are my newfound friendships. Take my block barkada (aka bitches) for instance. We're all weird. We all have our quirks and eccentricities. Each one of us has our own distinct personalities very very different from one another. Yet, for some reason I can't explain, all of us...we just fit. And although it's only been how long, I can't imagine having gone through this sem without them.

Another thing that undoubtedly fits perfectly into my life are rekindled old friendships. I don't think I've ever been closer to Nigga, Sis, Margarita, Hy, Frooney (and many others) than I am now (sort-of codenames used for the sake of anonymity) These are the people who I've known for the longest time, who know the many layers of me. They're the people I know I can turn to in desperate times. Their friendships not only fit into my life puzzle perfectly, they're locked and bound perfectly, too.

______________________________________________________

These past four months, I've seen people change before my eyes. The good changes made me awe at people; I was so happy for them because I always knew they had it in them to grow like that. Of course, I also saw and heard people do and say things that kind of disappointed me, too. And I'm not talking about things shallow things like smoking or getting majorly drunk--No, I don't judge that easily. What really disappoints me is when people abandon their old friendships for what may seem new and exciting. It disappoints me because people give up so much of what is good about them...and for what? Popularity,...well, that's about it.

__________________________________________

In my old school, two things that were always taught to us were 1) to do everything excellently, and 2) to see the best side of others. At the beginning of June, I kept insisting to myself to try and be friends with a lot of people and "see the best side of others." It kind of backfired though because in seeing the best side of others, I failed to see what wasn't so good. At the beginning, I made a lot of misjudgements in character. Weird, because having good judgement in character is something I've always had. But I guess I know better now. I know the kind of people I naturally get along with, the kind of people I can hang out with only for so long, and the kind of people I should be avoiding. And I'm happy to say I'm better for it.

Back then I also always thought, I should be excellent in all that I do and get high grades. Unfortunately, when I got to college, I painfuly realized that getting high grades doesn't always make me "excellent." Sure, grades measure one's performance in school, but to be honest, i'm not so sure if they measure how much we've learned. And maybe that's really how excellence is measured--by how much we learned. And I have to say, the subject I've learned a great deal in this year also happens to be the subject in which I am practically walking on eggshells just to pass.

Eternal Analysis of the Logical Mind

2005-10-13T19:23:00.000+08:00

As of right now, I am supposed to be watching Joms and Papu's play; however, due to some unfortunate circumstances, I am stuck here at home ranting like a brat even if it's sembreak and there's so much reason to be glad.

Now, I am not blaming the fact that I am rotting away here on my driver who is busy picking up my father from the airport of the taxi company who wants to charge me an extra fifty bucks or the taxi drivers that just never pass in our area. I am blaming my situation on the lack of logical reasoning skills present in our society today. I mean, think about it--there are so many good laws waiting to be passed out there but because our government officials are just so...what's the word for it...unreasonable, we can't seem to get anywhere.

And what does this have to do with me? I am seventeen years old and perfectly capable of following rules and regulations, and I honestly do believe I am more disciplined than half the citizens in this country. Heck, I've never been drunk, I've never taken drugs, and I have never been arrested. In fact, I am such a darling daughter that I HAVE NO IDEA WHY MY PARENTS WON'T ALLOW ME TO DRIVE!!! :õ

First of all, let me say, I think I make a relatively convincing debater. I have argued--no, reasoned--with my parents over and over again on why I should be allowed to drive. And these are the following reasons:

- The earlier I learn to practice driving, the earlier I will be able to use these skills. I mean, if I study how to drive, I will be an expert driver right away. And let's face it--in this country, expert, law-abiding drivers are what we need.

- Second, for practicality's sake, there are times when I won't always be able to rely on my driver or my uncle or my parents taking me places. I mean, my parents are never here anyway, and just like today, there are times when other members of the family, too, have very important plans and need the driver; therefore, I should respect that. So now, the only means in which I am assured to go places is if I learn to drive myself. (and come to think of it, it really is reflective of society's psychosis in which we are, economically (and in other aspects) not getting anywhere due to our limitations that if we just worked a little bit hard enough, can be corrected)

- Moving on... learning to drive this early will be beneficial not only to myself, but to so many other people, namely: my driver, who is of course, always tired and pissed at me for my constantly changing plans; my little sister, who, in one to two year's time, will be attending parties, requiring a driver to pick her up at a very late hour in the evening, and my parents, who can sleep soundly knowing I have a ride home.

- Also, school now, isn't what it used to be. Sometimes, very important plans have to be mabe at the last minute. Again, it will be a lesser hassle if I had greater control by getting a license and being allowed to drive.

- In relation to my previous point, as of now, the places I really need to be most of the time, are school and occassionally, people's houses to do schoolwork. And if you really look at it, these places are safe places. It isn't as if I'm going to go driving off to Quezon Avenue or Malate to do God knows what. Not only is that unnecessary but also, I reeally wouldn't want to go there anyway.

Oh! I also forgot that sometimes, I will have to go to malls to buy certain things like yellow and pink highlighters and 0.5 gel pens in order to satisfy my obsessive compulsion. Though one may argue that malls aren't so safe, there are some malls where people hardly go to such as The Podium or Shangri-La, which also happens to be very near our home.

- Finally, I would like to say: it isn't as if I won't have a car to drive anyway.

The reason given to me by my dear father for not allowing me to handle an automobile is that I am "too young to drive." Of course, this clashes the statement he made to my tita about my younger cousin, "Pie, dapat paaralin mo nang mag-drive si Justin." To this, I replied, "WHAT?! So then let me drive! I'm older!" And his unreasonable, prejuducial respose was, "Eh kasi, you're a girl."

I think it's pretty clear how the double-standard is unfair, but I once asked myself the question, "What has age got to do with becoming a responsible driver?" Is it not so that the younger one learns the value of discipline and practicality, the more it will be instilled in his/her character? And I am not so young as not to understand the laws that have been imposed and the reasons I should follow them! Perhaps my parents believe that patience, too, is a virtue, and I must wait till I am "older." (God knows when that will be) But patience is, of course, another value that will be reinforced in me once I learn how to drive. After all, it takes patience to obtain the skills in driving around in this chaotic, traffic-filled city.

Sufficely to say, with all the evidence I have given, I clearly have more reasonable, more convincing arguements than my father with regards to this issue. However, because he is the boss of the house, I barely have a say in the matter of being allowed to drive. I suppose since the "logical approach" in convincing my parents has not worked, I must now appeal to their emotions and use my acting skills to show them that I am "so disheartenes and disappointed" that I could not go where I wanted to be and spent time with people I "rarely" see.

Oh well. Like I said at the beginning, it is sembreak and there is much reason to be glad. My tests are all over, and although I literally and figuratively "can't seem to get anywhere," at least I still have my dvds and dvd players to run to. Ü

Eto na naman.

2005-10-09T18:15:00.000+08:00

Right now I'm supposed to be writing a film review for English on Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind but then I realized just like acting I need to feel strongly about something to write really well and since I can't really write what I feel like writing about in an English paper I shall write whatever I feel like writing here and this is what I feel like writing.

When I was first year High School, I was convinced I was going crazy because of the major mood swings I would have. Sometimes, I would be the girl with a smile plastered on her face, but sometimes I would just rather lie in bed and listen to songs like "Everything" from Lifehouse. Now that I think about it, I think I can trace my sleeping problem of sleeping too much to that practice of lying in bed all day listening to depressing or semi-depressing music. It's like I have developed the talent of mimicking the effect of valium without actually putting my body through it.

Haay. Here I go again with me, my created problems and my psychoanalysis crap.

Anyway, fast forward to now. Now? I dunno. I am somewhat in the same state again. I say somewhat because I'm not just cheery-moody. Sometimes, especially in school, I feel like I am incapable of reacting to people. People say or do something and I can't find it in me to show any genuine, raw reaction. It's as if things are all happening before me, but I'm not a part of it. I'm just an observer (which explains why I am always the last to know about what is happening in my surroundings), and I'll always be just an observer. And now that I think about it, it scares me because now, it's almost as if I'm incapable of intimacy. I don't just mean that in a romantic sort of way, but it's like, the inability to form a really close bond with anyone new becomes a psychosis I have to deal with. And the ironic thing is it has a lot of emotional baggage to go with it.

Long Pause.

And now I have run out of emotions. I'm only hungry.

___________________________________________

It is a terrible thing to be so open, it is as if my heart put on a face and walked into the world. -Sylvia Plath

Things to Do During Sembreak

2005-09-28T10:53:00.000+08:00

1. Change my hairstyle (but I dunno if I should have another perm or leave my hair as it naturally is)
2. Go shopping in Metrowalk and Greenhills.
3. Get a hold of Desperate Housewives and Lost VCDs.
4. Go out with:
- barkada
- block
- AC peeps
- bluereppers
5. Blue Rep Cast Party!
6. Go Gig-hopping
7. Go to La Salle and visit friends
8. Fix my email
9. Fix my LJ
10. Fix my computer files
11. Fix my 1st Sem things
12. Read books

Ever After!

2005-09-28T10:51:00.000+08:00

The woods people all living happily ever after except me and the stepsisters.

A Really Really Long Post That Says Almost Everything

2005-09-28T10:43:00.000+08:00

It was a week after the Orsem, a week after feeling "Crap. Why again did I choose to go to Ateneo and not UP?", that I decided to sign up for Blue Rep. I almost wasn't going to because I didn't want the bad feeling I got when I had flunked an audition before. (ehem. *thrice*) But then I thought, what the heck! Might as well make a fool of myself while I'm a freshman! And so I did audition (as well as make a fool of myself.) To my surprise, I got in! whoppee...

And so some days later, we had our GA and our workshops, and once again, I struggled to remember names. I was so glad though (and of course, slightly very intimidated) that Charmie was with me. Comm and English blockmates Anabelle, Van, Mika, Alexa, Ozzy and Gela were there too (and PE classmate Geoc! And Chem classmate Kitin!)...Then at the end of it all, (well, actually...it was just the beginning) we had our auditions for Blue Revue!

Worried that I would probably get out of tune or that my voice wouldn't be bee-you-tiful enough like Charmie Iñigo's, I decided to sort of "cheat" and did the witch's rap from Sondheim's Into The Woods instead of some melodic song like "Forever Yours". A week later, I got the part of the witch! (and a bonus of Mark's mom in Rent, too!)

...And so the real work began. At first rehearsals would be from 4:30 to 6:30 everday with Macky, our director and Gino, our musical director. Then it became 4:30 to 9:30. And in rehearsals I learned to/that:

- Keep it Fresh! Like it was happening for the very first time, right then and there.
- Lahat, may pinanggalingan.
- NEVER BREAK.
- Study your script and notes; master your character, your choreo & your music, and then HAVE FUN!
- GIVE GIVE GIVE!

And that's just the acting part! (synthesized, of course) More importantly, I learned how to discipline myself. I learned how to balance bluerep with academics. I learned that with a LOT of practice, I actually can dance! (maybe even do a jazz pirouette or two.) I learned that it actually is possible to gain best friends in just a short timespan, and I learned that No amount of gold or silver or diamonds would ever be worth as much as the Blood, Sweat and Tears that had been because of our LOVE for theatre and the people we experienced it with.

Yes, I praise and thank God everyday for all this, but I still can't help but wonder why I should be so lucky to have these talents and abilities or this opportunity or the people to share it all with or the parents who love me enough to understand why I do this. All I can really say is Thank You, LORD!

_________________________________________________________________
Rodgers and Hammerstein once wrote:

Climb every mountain,

Search high and low,

Follow every byway,

Every path you know.

Climb every mountain,

Ford every stream,

Follow every rainbow,

'Till you find your dream.

A dream that will need

All the love you can give,

Every day of your life

For as long as you live.

And I think maybe I've found that dream.

2005-09-06T22:41:00.000+08:00

You are the drawing.
Saint Exupery's 'The Little Prince' Quiz.
brought to you by Quizilla

Some verses from my new favorite song!

2005-08-21T20:36:00.000+08:00

Defying Gravity (from the musical, "Wicked")

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by
The rules of someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes
And leap...

It's time to try defying gravity
I think I'll try defying gravity
And you can't pull me down

I'm through accepting limits
Cuz someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change
But till I try I'll never know
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love I guess I've lost
Well if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost

I'd sooner buy defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye,
I'm defying gravity
And you can't pull me down!

So if you care to find me
Look to the Western sky!
As someone told me lately
Everyone deserves the chance to fly
And if I'm flying solo
At least I'm flying free
To those who ground me
Take a message back from me!
Tell them how I am defying gravity
I'm flying high, defying gravity
And soon I'll match them in renown
And nobody in all of Oz
No Wizard that there is or was
Is ever gonna bring me down!!

La Vie Boheme!

2005-08-20T12:28:00.000+08:00

Which Rent character are you?

And now, today for you...

"Maynila: Sa mga Kuko ng Liwanag"

2005-08-04T22:40:00.000+08:00

Last Tuesday, I watched my first Lino Brocka film, "Maynila: Sa mga Kuko ng Liwanag" about a guy, Julio, from the province who goes to Manila and tries to find his girlfriend. In the process, he experiences what it is like to be part of the working class and urban poor. He also finds (and loses) some friends and ends up working as a call boy. (Kinda like Jon Voight in Midnight Cowboy) One day, as he was loitering like he always does, he sees his girlfriend, the beautiful Ligaya Paraiso, walking to a church, and he follows her. They talk, sleep with each other, talk some more, and he finds out that Ligaya was brought to Manila to become a prostitute. Some time ago, pinag-interesan siya ng isang Intsik at ginawa siyang ka-live in. They had a baby. Now, she wants to escape from the abusive relationship with the ill-tempered Chinese guy, and start over with Julio. In the end, Ligaya tries to escape, but she dies. Julio had been waiting for her. When the news got to him, he killed the pimp who brought Ligaya to Manila using an ice pick. And so, he runs. runs and runs. He is then mobbed by a crowd and is beaten to death.

For a flick made in the seventies, it's pretty creative. The language wasn't pilit, and it wasn't afraid to tackle a lot of controversial issues. Sure, it got overly dramatic at some point, and it was a little slow-paced, but it was able to give me something no other fictional Tagalog flick has given me before: the closest glimpse of the world that I am so sheltered from.

A lot of times, it scares me, really. I know it will be inevitable... that one day, I will meet harshness and cruelty, and equipped with only the knowledge I have learned in school as well as not-so-thick skin, how am I ever going to survive? I can barely even do anything by myself. I guess there really is just one thing to resort to, and that is adaptation.

LOST

2005-08-04T22:30:00.000+08:00

You are Charlie. Bass player for Driveshaft. With crazy hair and hobbitish good looks, you attract many admirers. You like to decorate your fingers with letters on tape. Oh, and you're a junkie. You're the one who's ready to ask the really tough questions: is day-turning-into-night end-of-the-world type weather normal? And guys, where ARE we?

Which Lost Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

My surname should be changed to "Teevee"

2005-07-31T20:34:00.000+08:00

After lunch today, I watched the latest CSI episode directed by Quentin Tarantino on AXN, and it had just the right amount of drama I was looking for. Of course, some parts were so predictable, and it did have a Hollywood ending...but I mean, come on! Poor Nicky CANNOT die! Of course, I was half expecting that he'd go crazy and not become a CSI anymore. Or that he would get injured like he'd break his legs and have to be on a wheelchair. I think that would be kinda cool (Kay. Martina is gonna kill me for saying that.)

But then, of course, there are times when someone has to die. Like in Lost. I must say.. If Mill hadn't told me, I never would've expected it to be Boone. ( :c He's too cute to die) Then again, he does seem like one of those disposable characters.

Homay. I just saw the new Incubus video. "Make a Move" from the movie, Stealth. (Directed by the same guy who directed The Fast and the Furious.)

I almost can't believe it, but Brandon Boyd is still hotter than ever.

Hmm... this looks pretty enjoyable...It's the soundtrack of Stealth. I think I'll post it here so I'll remember to buy it later on.

01. Incubus - Make A Move
02. Incubus - Admiration
03. Incubus - Neither of Us Can See
04. BT featuring David Bowie - (She Can) Do That
05. Sly & The Family Stone featuring will.i.am - Dance To The Music
06. Institute - Bullet-proof Skin
07. Kasabian - L.S.F.
08. Dredg - Bug Eyes
09. The Fray - Over My Head (Cable Car)
10. Trading Yesterday - One Day
11. Acceptance - Different
12. Glenn Hughes, Chad Smith, John Frusciante - Nights In White Satin
13. Incubus - Aqueous Transmission (I LOVE this song!!!)

HOLY COW. I haven't blogged in 28 days!

2005-07-31T00:25:00.000+08:00

Today I had lunch with my twin, Ana, Jess, Ina and Maria in UP. Catching up on each other's lives was fun. I'm really gonna miss Jess when she moves. We've been the closest of friends since Kinder, but we haven't been classmates since Grade 5. I really kinda regret not spending enough time with her in High School. But then, in some way, it's okay because Jess is one of those people that even if I haven't talked to in a long time, the next time we talk, I can talk to her casually and openly as if it was some ordinary day in AC.

I must admit, I am quite jealous of Ana. She is now taking up Film, which I was supposed to take because I have been dying to become a filmmaker since first year highschool. But for God knows what reason (I can't remember now) , I decided to go to Ateneo. I honestly don't know what the heck I was thinking when I decided that. Not that I'm not happy, I just wonder sometimes what might have become of me if I'd gone to UP.

Interesting fact I learned from Ana today: Did you know why the shape of those little compartments in beehives are hexagon? It's because if you compare it with a square and a triangle, if all three had the same perimeter, then the area of the hexagon would be largest-- good for bees to store honey and so they have room to do whatever it is they do. And if all of them had the same area, the hexagon would have the smallest perimeter--so as to conserve space for the honey. (Cool noh?) Aha! Also...diba when bees find sources of food, they signal other bees to go to that place? So how do they direct the other bees towards it? They use the rays of the sun to form an angle, and that angle shows the other bees where to go. So cool!... See, these are the interesting things freshmen in UP learn in Math2: Practical Math. Not me. I, on the other hand, have to sit in boring, extra hot Math classes during hora de peligro. And in trying to listen to the teacher talk about parabolas and circles, my ears fail to function, and all I hear is that sound that comes out of the TV when you turn to Channel three.

Next Sem, Ana's gonna start having film classes like film 100 and stuff. :( I'm so jealous.

Oh well. Today has been a good week, despite the fact that it started wrong. Last Tuesday, I woke up late and came to school in bitin, high-waisted jogging pants, ugly fake rubber shoes, poofy unruly hair and a big baggy PE t-shirt. I felt so ugly and hot and not myself. And then later that afternoon, we had a quiz in Math and I didn't finish. But then, I got home early and was able to relax and watch Desperate Housewives. Come Wednesday, I had a BlueRep workshop, and even if I had been in school from 730 am to 730 pm, I was'nt that tired. It really didn't feel like a chore at all. Thursday, I got home early, napped, watched Lost, and almost cried because Boone died. :õ (okay, not really, but I was sad :c) But it's getting pretty egg-zay-ting! Ü And Friday, we had our auditions, and surprisingly, I didn't suck as much as I thought I would. Or so I think.

*sigh*... I guess I better sleep now. I shall close my eyes and visit the realm of Morpheus. Good Night. (Actually, Good morning if you want to be technical. Ü)

But before that, check out the pics in Sam's blog! scary shit.

Quotes from some of my best friends!

2005-07-03T12:57:00.000+08:00

"Don't you worry your little heart." -Frannie Medina

"The boy you love will always be an exception." -Mara Navarro

"People will always tell you that their friends are nice." -Anika Ventura

...But of course, I'd have to give props to...

"Boys are cheats and liars. Go for a girl instead" -Martina Ledesma

"Girls are too maarte. Go for trees instead!" - Frannie Medina

"Trees are too high maintenance... go for lifesize standees of superheroes instead! like the ones in Jollibee or hobby shops!" - Katrina Villanueva

Hahahahaha!!!!

I bet you didn't know...

2005-06-17T20:32:00.000+08:00

1. When I was Prep, I memorized the capitals and flags of some countries in the world.

2. Last year, when I auditioned for theatrica, I sang "hopelessly devoted to you". I wore a Sandra D. sweater and had a picture frame with ____'s picture. Hahaha!! How pathetic! (but I got in!)

3. Offer me some Kitkat white, and I assure you: I will not ever say no.

4. I have kept every ID since Kinder to First Year College.

5. When I was Grade 6, I wanted to be a chemist.

6. It is my dream to be invited to the Cannes Film Festival.

7. My top three favorite Contrabidas: Gollum, Darth Vader and Tyler Durden of "The Fight Club"

8. I wanted to star as an extra in LOTR. Kahit na one of the orcs lang.

9. My "type" of guys: Ü

10. My type of car:

11. My dad once said I looked like Bloody Mary from South Pacific. :õ

12. When I was seven, I watched a Cinderella play, and Prince Charming went down to the audience to fit the shoe. He went to me, put the shoe on my foot, and when it didn't fit, gave me a peck on the cheek. Ü

13. Next Halloween, I plan on going as Padme Amidala with my escort, Darth Vader-- my seven year-old cousin, Adrian.

14. I love the gelatos and pasta they sell in "Amici" in Don Bosco. Especially the mint chocolate gelato! SArap!

15. I broke my right ankle once from falling down the stairs, and sprained it twice, once from taekwondo and another one from getting "tapilok". And I've gotten "tapilok" about a hundred times.

16. Sad to say, Harry Potter, for me, ends at book four.

17. I have never had a nosebleed or chicken pox, nor have I ever been confined to the hospital.

18. I like taking a bath 2-3 times a day, maybe more when it's summer.

19. The Horror movies that scare me are the Pinoy ones with the weird-looking creatures like that of "Impakta" and "Shake, Rattle and Roll"

20. I consume as much water as an elephant does.

Recants!

2005-06-15T21:36:00.000+08:00

I take back what I said in a previous post..that i didn't like "my chemical romance" because for some reason, i keep listening to it on my i-pod. I've had a lot of finch lately, too. How weird. Seems my taste is evolving.

I also take back what I said about Angelina Jolie back in the Tomb Raider days. I watched Mr and Mrs Smith, and now, I want Angelina hair, Angelina voice, Angelina lips, Angelina legs and Angelina kindness.

I also take back the rhetorical question I asked Marapot on what she finds in chinitos.

And lastly, I take back my statement, "I should've gone to UP film!" because this past week has been hella-fun. Ü

First Day of Shkool!!!

2005-06-14T15:22:00.000+08:00

If you know me, then you'd know I've been in the same effing school for 13 years. If you don't, well, there you go. Today... for the first time...(not counting Orsem) I was... (tan-tananan!) a "new girl"!!! Well then again, so was every other freshman.

Got to school via carpool (Ping's car) with other carpoolies, and finally, the dreaded first Class: Filipino. To my wonderful surprise, I'm classmates with MaraLla! Yey! Oh... but not to my wonderful surprise, we had some dumb diagnostic test that I am sure would put me in basic Filipino and make me take summer! But on the bright side, the crappiness ends there.

The next hour break I was... (in a game show host-sounding voice) NOT A LONER! Let me repeat that. I WAS NOT A LONER! Ü Yey! (moment of my life!) and after I went to PE, and our teacher just let us sign some stuff and leave!

The next hour and a half break, to my wonderful surprise (again), I was NOT A LONER (again!!!) Woohoo!! and so I ate my lovely pimiento sandwich and refilled my water, and walked with friends to Math 11.

I sat in front (where you'd think is the teacher's pet's seat, but actually, it's beside the exit and right under the fan and strategically positioned where the teacher probably won't see you if you fall asleep) ; I wrote notes to people as the teacher babbled, and finally, we were dismissed! It seemed like only fifteen minutes, now that I think about it. I went to the caf with friends again, and before I knew it, I was home! Home at not 5pm, not 4pm, not 3pm but 2:30pm!! On a regular school day! Yehey! Ü

Attention!

2005-06-13T09:16:00.000+08:00

Dear reader,

Greetings!

Today I have decided to do some editing in my blog because I realized YOU people actually read the junk I write! And in reading the junk I write, you might actually find stuff about me that I don't want you to know. For example, just an example, that I like injections or say, that I might have scoliosis, zemmiphobia, obsessive compulsive disorder, schizophrenia, histrionic disorder, attention deficit disorder, low blood pressure, narcolepsy, myopia, astigmatism, chapped lips and autodysmophobia. (Well thank GOD I'm not a hypochondriac! Ü) And that possibly, for some out-of-this-world reason... that I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU.

So now, I shall leave, because I need to go to the Doctor (really). So long. Farewell.

Independence Day? I hardly feel independent.

2005-06-12T16:23:00.000+08:00

Nako! Parang a lot has happened since I last posted! Anyway, let me just write what's worth writing.

First, a shoutout. Happy Birthday Justin! (That's it. I can't think of anything smarter to say)

I like my block, course and english. People are nice (for the lack of a better word, but they are, really) I wanna join BlueRep and Loyola Film Circle. I suppose joining LFC is the closest I can get to Cannes...no, wait! I take that back! If Claudine Baretto can get an invite to Cannes, so can I!

Going to a carpool meeting later. I like my sked. Halfday everyday except Wednesdays which is like regular HS days. But I start sooo early everyday, and as you can see from my username, waking up at the break of dawn is indeed is a curse.

Yesterday we had our guidance test... and after four days of going to Ateneo straight, I finally found a crush :þ! Pero nakoo... we weren't introduced! I don't even know what block or course he's in, just his first name. So anyway, lessons learned: always introduce people, and try talking to strangers more (well, not really "strangers", other schoolmates) but not in a psychotic way. Oh... and never let anyone feel out of place.

Oh, and about the guidance test, I have a confession to make. There was a question that said, "How do you stay psychologically healthy?" (or something like that) I didn't tell them that I take prozac. Does it really matter??? Oh well. Someone's probably gonna figure it out anyway.

Shit! I really really really really wanna go to fete de la musique but I've been asking for so much lately that I'm afraid to ask for this... hmm, maybe the foot-in-the-door method will work.

Okay... I have to go now. Buh-bye, buh-bye!

A bit about ORSEM

2005-06-08T17:30:00.000+08:00

I am so tired I could just turn down a date from Brad Pitt if he asked me out right now... or maybe not. But I'd think twice.

I think I have muscles now in my right arm from doing that do-you-hear-the-people-sing (from Les Mis) style arm movement while singing, "Mary for you... for your white and blue..."

That's all I can say, plus Orsem was fun. I'm just so tired now!!

Another one of my predictions

2005-06-05T20:58:00.000+08:00

(Note: another one of my drama moments)

By the end of this year, everyone in my barkada will have boyfriends except for me. Pathetic! And so, I shall be doomed to a life of lonerness once again. I can imagine a conversation happening...

Me: Franoots! (example. but this can also mean Ysa, Anika, Martina, Mara Lla, etc.) Wanna have lunch together later? (you know, how we always do)
Frannie: Oh! I was planning to go na kasi with (hmm... let's see) Joaquin
Me: Oh...i see.
Frannie: But if you want, you can probably go with us. (this of course would be a pity invite, I'm sure she prefers if I didn't go)
Me: Ah.. no, it's okay. I'll ask Ysa nalang. sige, have fun!
(I call Ysa. phone rings. conversation:)
Me: Hey Ys! Wanna have lunch?
Ysa: Oh.. sorry, Liz. I have this test kasi and me and (fill guy's name here) are studying together.
Me: Ah okay!
Ysa: I'd really love to go but I'm helping him cuz he's kinda having trouble with the subject eh.
Me: It's ok! No prob (but really...:c)

So now... I go walk around... looking for a trycicle, I find none... it suddenly starts to rain very hard.. I have no umbrella, I'm soaking wet...suddenly....... I see Marge running with her boy holding an umbrella over her head, they're running to his car...

And I stand there all alone. Under the dark, heavy rain clouds. And that is my situation. It will be my situation for the rest of my life.... T_T

Palawan Pics!

2005-06-04T17:54:00.000+08:00

LOST should've been filmed here!!!

Tingnan mo... diba parang fake?

A Cloudy Day on Arrecefi Island

The Subterranean river...where I had a date with....BATMAN!!! (tananananananana)

Ahhh.... now who doesn't like sunsets??

Here's a funny story:

My ate: What fruit is that kaya?
Me: Maybe it's a pineapple
Sabs: Pineapples don't grow on trees!! (tama nga naman) It looks like an atis.
Me: It's a pineatis!! Hahaha!

But actually... it's a pandan fruit.

Confessions...(Part Two)

2005-06-02T18:38:00.000+08:00

Okay. Stupid just got stupider.

Why so? Well if you scroll down in this site you will see a portion entitled "join me in my advocacies" and it says "anti-human slavery" Not anti human slavery, but anti-human slavery. I just realized.

So since it's June, I suppose it's about time I start posting my thoughts on the incoming schoolyear. (1 minute pause) Okay, I'm so ____ I can't even think of anything. See... I can't even think of an adjective! Ok seriously though... part of me is excited for the following reasons

1. It's the whole "college experience"
2. Meeting new people and making new friends
3. I think my course is really gonna be fun, and
4. I DESPERATELY WANNA SEE MY FRIENDS... YOU CANNOT EVEN BEGIN TO IMAGINE HOW MUCH I MISS THEM. (unless maybe you're one of them which you probably are if you're reading this)

But part of me is scared. Not in a nervous way, but in a way that the fear makes me want to not be open to others and open to change because I liked what I had before. I had the best friends, I was good at school, I was popular (I mean, not mala-"mean girls", but I felt loved because there are only a hundred sixty plus people in my batch and everyone knew everyone else) and teachers were kind, and okay... this is gonna sound really really really kapal but people like me! (again... I must super duper emphasize this: not in a "the hot chick- I-think-i'm-perfect" way)but in the sense that nobody hated me... or at least not to a grabacious extent.

What if in college it changes? As pathetic as this sounds, I don't think I'll be able to stand it if I a) don't do well in college or b) for some reason... people just don't seem to like me!! (Long long pause)

Then again... To conquer fear, you must become fear. I dunno how exactly I can become fear, but I can pretend that I'm confident, uber-friendly with a pleasing attitude and a magnetic personality. (haha! it'll take a lot, but I could try) In the words of Ms. Jen, "fake it till you make it"-- not faking who I am, but faking having courage, that's all. And just as important, I should probably make my philosophy in college, "Be confidence. (that's right. be confidence.) And don't be afraid of what others think of me" There's a difference with not caring what others think of me (because I care) and not being afraid of what they think.

So back to bum-dom...It's the nanny and I'm gonna watch.

Confessions of a bonafide bum

2005-06-01T19:59:00.000+08:00

Summer is almost coming to an end, and the truth is, I am at the peak of my stupidity. My mom asked me a while ago for my diploma so that she could file it, and guess what??? My trash can came to life and ate the damn thing! Haha!!... Or so I thought. For the past 2 months it has been sitting in the pages of one of my many atlases on one of my many bookshelves. Why on earth would I put it there? To flatten it out. Because right after graduation, in the midst of all the people hugging and cheering, I dropped it. That's right. I dropped it. On the floor. To be stepped on by a hundred girls.

So what is it that has me getting stupider every minute? Why, TV of course! I admit it... I watch too much TV. Even after reading Charlie and the Chocolate Factory this summer I still watch too much TV. (and its because of TV that the books I read are only of that level) But it's summer anyway so what the heck! I'll be studying my ass off in two weeks. I always do. (hahahaha! ok... maybe not always. not even close.)

Okay change topic. Yipee!!! Halmark is showing reruns of The Nanny! I miss that show! I must say, now that I think about it, in terms of funniness, The Nanny probably comes after Friends. So now I have something to look forward to on Thursdays at 6:30.

I don't really like MTV much, but as I was flipping through channels, I saw My Chemical Romance. Someone asked me a few days ago if I liked them, and I said that I haven't really listened to them. I am very picky when it comes to punk rock and emo. Though I like few. (emphasis on few) So now that I got the chance to listen to them, I find that their music is semi-bearable. I guess liking it requires me to be in a punky mood, with a Marissa-like angst.

Now that I think about it, I don't really like much of the music played on MTV and the radio. These are my present favorites: Phoenix, The Postal Service (especially "sleeping in"...soundtrack of my life), The Vines, Modest Mouse and a few songs from Wakefield. I like Coldplay's "Clocks" too.

So now it's thundering very loud. Very scay-ry I'll stop muna. I don't think it's too advisable to be online right now. I'll write again later. I still feel the need to let the absurdities inside this head of mine to keep me sane.

Princesa sa Puerto Princesa!

2005-06-01T09:22:00.000+08:00

Just got back from Puerto Princesa yesterday noon... soooo fun man!!! We stayed in Dos Palmas the first 2 nights and 3 days and I went Kayaking, SCUBA diving (yeh, baybeh! the real thing!), Snorkeling, Picnicking in an island, photographing nature scenes, watching the dance troupe dance native dances, and of course... sweeming in da beech! It was the bestest ever, and the people were uber friendly and the food was uber uber sarap!

The next 2 day and 2 nights were spent in the city proper and in the breathtaking subterranean river... I learned lots that day, such as:

1. the rock formation or the cliff where the river is was formed about 1 million years ago

2. the monkeys in the forest where the river is cannot be fed because the monkeys might get dependent, like in indonesia, they always feed the monkeys so some monkeys pull tourist's hair and one even went down to the village looking for human food

3. crocodiles cant live in the underground river because it's too dark, but turtles and sea snakes do. But according to the boatman, there's no need to go all the way to Palawan to find Crocs... we have 'em right here... in Congress and the Senate. hahaha!

4. They also share the cave with some tarantulas which live inside the cave's cathedral... which isn't actually a cathedral, but rock formations in the shape of a melting candle, Mama Mary Praying, Jesus's face, Saint Joseph, an Angel and the three Kings.

5. The water in the river is brackish, a mix of fresh and saltwater.

6. In the cave, there are also bats and swallows... which are blind birds that make these sounds so they know where they're going... kinda like the "power" of daredevil

7. In Palawan, people wondered why the giraffes have short necks. Until they realized it was because we had short trees. So what they're doing now is they go to really high places so that the girrafes' necks will stretch when being fed.

8. There was a downside to being in this lovely amazing place... there are a lot of snatchers. It's true... I saw with my own eyes a snatcher get the bag of peanuts of one girl. Nobody felt bad though cuz the snatchers were incredibly cute-- cute little monkeys . No wonder we evolved from them!

9. The first recorded exploration of the cave was by an American Scientist and his team. Not natives cuz they were afraid of "mga espiritu" (but i'm sure some of them explored it too) They explored 8-point-something kilometers of the river, but it's longer than that. It just so happened that they ran out of food. Lucky for them, there was an opening in the ceiling. That's how they got out. Actually, the boatman said, if you continue on and on, there is no exit to the other side. Just a dead end. (ooohh)

10. The Underground river was only made a heritage site in 1999 so you can still see some graffiti the made by people......particularly the Americans.... dated 1939.

This time, it paid to listen to our tour guide, Ellen. At least when she spoke in the car, she talked only for the first 30 minutes (on and off) not like our tour guide for Mt. Banahaw, that incredibly annoying little man who talked tuloy tuloy for the whole four hour trip!!! (and back!) First off, 80% of the things he was saying were just lame-ass jokes that I certainly did not find entertaining or the least bit funny. Second, I could not even sleep! That just turned the situation from very bad to worse (the worst!) *haay* Sorry... got a little carried away there... that was one of the most traumatizing experiences of my life!

Anyway... after that educational trip, we went to the Vitnamese village and bought some yummy Jackfruit chips. The next day, we went home. awww.

But the trip was absolutely definitely positively 110% worth it! Because it made me realize that Palawan people take such pride in their land, you can see from how they speak about it, and they take marvelous care for it as well. (mygally! i mean, there's a trash can every 10 meters, 25m in the medyo farflung areas... and i like their slogan, something like, "magtapon ng basura at mabibilanggo ka... nakakahiya diba?") and they are really promoters of Eco-tourism. I think if
all Filipinos could just be like that, our country would be in a much better place right now. Ü

Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried...

2005-05-24T14:26:00.000+08:00

So enough about Star Wars, movies, shopping, television, etc. and those other shallow things I write about 90% of the time. Now, I want to write about the people who really, truly, genuinely makes me feel special: my friends. particularly my HS friends. So now I want to make myself feel good by remembering the happy times in HS. Note: This list is incomplete and in no particular order.

1. I remember that day when it was almost Christmas and we were having Kris-Kringle and Martina was Roco's mommy and she threw her gift and it hit Roco's head and literally, she didn't even know what hit her and everyone kept laughing and still Roco didn't know what was going on

2. I remember the time during grad practice when an entire batch was so close to bursting into laughter even though it was a serious moment because Sr. Rodriguez goes "Go home, good night be well, sleep tight" I mean, honestly, what a stupid thing to say to try and teach teenagers a serious lesson and it was so uncalled for, making it super funny

3. I remember when Sr. Potts (Sr. Henry) our CLE teacher in 3rd year started a class yahoo group and Martina started raving about a guy through email; she forgot that was the CLE yahoo group and sir comments by emailing: Martina, I hope you don't forget what we've learned about the ninth commandment or purity or something like that, and he really meant it seriously *nyaknyaknyak*

4. I miss when my seatmate Paola and I would write each other quotes for the day on little yellow post-its and her favorite was: "The objective of war is not to die for your country, but to make the other bastard die for his"

5. I miss when Frannie and I co-founded the Third Law of Thermodynamics which states "the hotness of Myself and Francesca Medina can be created but cannot be transferred from their bodies to another's"

6. I miss Chorale practices every after school until 6 or 7pm and Saturdays from 8-4 when we had to sing songs like"Masquerade! Paper Faces on Parade!" from the top of our lungs

7. I miss the siomai in AC (ten pesos each) even though I never ate it, I trust Marapot and Anika when they say it's really really good.

8. And also Frannie's Word-for-the-day presentations which I was always in, like the episodes on the greek gods. Only in Frannie's presentations can I ever be Aphrodite.

9. I miss our eco presentation that we filmed in Hema's bar, and my friend the lovely Mara Navarro was the star. I had the best group ever.

10. And also the presentation we filmed in MaraBan's house on Hidalgo street about the different media myths and we were just having fun "living in a material world and I am a material girl" and also the fake mtv-cribs

11. And I learned how to make friendship bracelets during grad practice

12. And I remember our class watching "Never been kissed" and from then on, Katrina established the "man-of-the-week" and the first one was Michael Vartan. Others that followed were Orlando Bloom, Hugh Jackman and Milo Ventimiglia

13. And also our lovely lovely retreats in third year when Vada jokes "na-Babacani" na siya and also in fourth year when Nadz had that funnee funnee pic taken of her by Fr. Edwin

14. And I miss teasing "captivating Kaila" and Angel, tongue-swallower

15. I miss making bets with people like Beia Santos who is supposed to take me out to lunch after she gets her first big break on TV

16. I miss the intrams, winning for cheerdance and playing Bataille. and I miss the ruthless Bataille-playing Pariessa.

17. I miss the funny incident during Eco when sir required us to have nameplates, and Raya wrote behind MaraBan's nameplate, "I'm a mighty t-bird" and Sir asked, "Mara, youre a mighty tbird?", and MaraBan (take note, Valedictorian) not knowing what a t-bird was, said "What's wrong with being a tbird?" and sir said, "nothing!" hahaha!

18. And the dancer-peeps! I miss the dancer peeps... Maki, Raya, Lacson, Mon A, and who would forget Car and Roco... dancing in the classroom without a care in the world.

19. And right now, most of all, I miss four-three.

In the words of Polonius, "Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried, grapple them unto thy soul with hoops of steel"

Thoughts on Star Wars

2005-05-20T15:43:00.000+08:00

Who is not a fan of Star Wars? I do not know.

Last night, I watched Star Wars with Marty and Jenny, and I won't make a review because I obviously think it rocks but I will post some thoughts.

1) I do not like Mace Windu. I just don't. Because I prefer arrogant bad guys (like Anakin) to arrogant good guys (like Mace Windu)

2) I am quite satisfied by how tragic the Jedis died. But if I were a Jedi, I would've "sensed" something wrong was going on. (yuck! ang kapal ko talaga) But really, I think they were too preoccupied with the war and stuff and that's why they "were clouded" by the dark side.

3) I think I would've made a good Sith lord and flat out, here is the reason why: I think the world revolves around ME.

4) How come, there are female Jedi but no female Sith??? Ha? Why? Isn't it so that women are more passionate and use their emotions a lot? So why, tell me...

5) Here is an if-question! If I were a Star Wars character, who would I be? Well.... I do not think I am gifted enough to be a Jedi. I am not bad enough to be a Sith. I hate politics so I am definitely not a separatist or a senator. I am not Promdi so that rules out being Luke Skywalker. I am not too into gambling therefore I cannot be Han. I also think that killing people should be only if I have to. So the way I see it, I can only be either of the following:

a. Princess Leia: because she is diplomatic and she comes from a good family and like her, I probably can't pull off using a lightsaber so I would use a blaster instead.

b. Chewbacca: because even if he has mood swings a lot (like me) he is caring and sincere and a very very loyal friend.

Wait... then again, I think maybe I can be a Jedi. I can predict the future (like I predicted how my friend Sam was the first to have a boyfriend among us friends and how Manna would take the cousin of someone we know to the prom and how sometimes, I "sense" it will rain and many many more) and I am very good at "reading people", (like for example, there is a certain teacher who's aura I truly dislike and who radiates bad vibes so I use my "inner force" to make myself deaf to this person's corny jokes) and when I used to take Taekwondo, I enjoyed sparring (except when I was a white belter)

But actually, if there was any way at all I could avoid the war and live peacefully with my family in paradise, I would.

So here would be the most possible answer to a most absurd question: I would probably just live in the beautiful planet of Naboo and not give a damn about the stupid war.

Still really bored.

2005-05-19T10:37:00.000+08:00

You are Benjamin McKenzie! You're handsome, talented and a bit

taken aback by the people who constantly tell you you're awesome!

You're only really just getting started in life and you're taking it

one day at a time, always with a smile.

Which OC Cast Member Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

You are Monica.

Which 'FRIENDS' character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Ode to Star Wars!

2005-05-18T13:36:00.000+08:00

Leia

You're the Princess, and your planet of Alderaan
was destroyed by Grand Moff Tarkin and Darth
Vader as they tested the powers of the Death
Star. After being rescued by Luke and Han and
Chewie, you got to plan the attack on the Death
Star and you led the Rebellion to victory. You
eventually get married to Han Solo. You like
scoundrels.

Which of the original Star Wars heroes are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Naboo!
The perfect paradise, I'd love to live here - as
royalty!

Which Star Wars planet are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

You weild a blue lightsaber.

Star Wars: What colour lightsaber should you weild?
brought to you by Quizilla

I am soo bored talaga.

2005-05-18T13:30:00.000+08:00

You have an entrancing kiss~ the kind that leaves
your partner bedazzled and maybe even feeling
he/she is dreaming. Quite effective; the kiss
that never lessens and always blows your
partner away like the first time.

What kind of kiss are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

You are a Mod. Yeah baby.

What kind of Sixties Person are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Boulevard of Broken Teeth

2005-05-17T18:06:00.000+08:00

How fun is my life??

4am: I woke up from another nightmare that I can't remember so I turned on the lava lamp until there was a little bit of sun coming up.
5am: I went back to sleep cuz for that whole hour I had none. I turned off the lava lamp because it might start a fire.
7am: I woke up again from a funny dream about my little sister caught in the middle of a fight between a rhino and a hippo. (totoo to ha)
8am: I "officially" got up.
8:20: I had what would be my last real meal for the day.
8:45: I took some lovely painkillers. Mefanamic Acid. 500 mg.
9am: had my operation. had 2 wisdom teeth pulled out, one on each side. but thanks to modest mouse and green day (see below for some added thoughts on green day) and audioslave, I survived and it wasn't as painful. At some point, I actually wanted to laugh kasi ang daming tumatalsik na laway and the sound of the vibrations fit the music I was listening to. I also felt at some point that I was about to commit suicide. All in all, it was not so painful, and even a bit fun.
10:15: operation over. It was about 14 songs long.
10:40: arrived home.
10:50: removed the icky icky sponges in my mouth dripping and soaked with blood and my saliva
1pm: slept slept slept.
2:30: woke up, with the numbness in my lips and chin gone. and i decided to eat some ice cream. Dulce de leche. I also trield eating lucky me's "lomi" noodles but i couldn't so i gave it to my sister and she was ecstatic!!
4pm: tv tv tv tv tv tv
5pm: blog blog blog. YM YM YM.

5:58: chatting overseas with nadz in London! woohoo! but my jaws still ache. and OHMYGALLY. Deja Vu.... parang i dreamt this before.

And now some added thoughts on "green day":
I am not really a big fan of punk rock, and i can only listen to emo when i'm in the mood, which is rarely, but i really like green day. maybe because they're more old school. definitely because they're better than the other bands of their genre.

ok. that's it. i need to change my ice pack. later at 8 i'll watch one tree hill. wait a minute! Why, by george! it's raining! that's wonderful. ok. i shall go now.

Paranoia strikes back

2005-05-15T18:54:00.000+08:00

At 4:37 am this morning, I woke up screaming and kicking because I had another bad dream about robbers. Actually, two bad dreams. A little before 6 am, I woke up screaming again. I don't remember one of the dreams but in the other one, there was a robber in my room and he was lurking over my bed and i was awake but i was pretending my bed and he started pulling down my body to the floor and then i was scared what he might do to me and then i woke up kicking and screaming.

But it's ok. it was JUST A DREAM.

And I think God said "kawawa naman si Liza" so when I was napping an hour ago, I had the nicest dream about being "lost" with eric bana. Actually, we were just sitting on the shore and talking the entire dream.

But why did it have to be JUST A DREAM??? :C :õ

So anyway, I am now watching "Malcolm in the Middle". It is very funny. Reese is so stupid.

Haayy nako.... my father did not allow me to learn to drive. because "i am too young". whatever... don't wanna write about it.

I sooo cannot wait to watch "Star Wars Episode 3: Revenge of the Sith" with Marts and Jenny. My crush Natalie Portman is there! and I also think Anakin is much hotter now that he's bad... but seriously, it must be such a DREAM to get to play Darth Vader-- to get to wear that black suit and cape and make those (SShhhaawww...) sounds! Woow!

Yesterday, I went to Hidden Valley in Laguna (I think) with the Mejia Clan. The pools were pretty cool, i guess, but the highlight was when i taught Pauline, my grade four cousin, how to swim! I swear, I am soo luck to have not only a big family (with more than 20 cuzzins in one side of the family), but to have really really kind-- ( it's one thing to be nice, it's another thing to be kind)-- titas, titos and cuzzins.

I am so excited to see my titos and titas and cuzzins from the States in September and October for my cousin's wedding! And Yey! I get to buy a new dress! Ok... a long time from now but still.

My new favorite bands: Phoenix and The Vines. I like the songs "Everything is Everything" and "Ride" and "Mary Jane" Oh! Also pala "The Blower's Daughter" by Damien Rice.

Ang tagal ng Ateneo i-send ang info about ORSEM! Still thinking... if I made the right decision.

Okay. I have to eat dinner now.

I'm a Monet!

2005-05-12T12:39:00.000+08:00

You Are Best Described By...

San Giorgio Maggiore, Twilight

By Claude Monet

What Famous Work of Art Are You?

HAHA! "The keys to my heart"

2005-05-12T12:00:00.000+08:00

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.

In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved.

You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.

Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage something you've always wanted... though you haven't really thought about it.

In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

Visions of the future

2005-05-10T18:05:00.000+08:00

My sister recently read to me something she wrote on a fourth year High School Project. It was about her "vision of the future". She wrote there that in the future, she imagined "that I would be working for a magazine like 'Seventeen' or to go local, 'Candy'" Pretty scary (and cool) considering she actually does work in Candy... She also wrote in 2002 a vision of herself 3 years from then. (following Ms. Laurie Beth Jones's book, "The Path") Something about wearing comfy and casual clothes in an office with a laid-back environment. And for lunch, she'd be meeting her old friends who she still talks to, and she will be interviewing some person later on. It's so cool how all of that turned out to be true. I guess it really is important to have a vision in mind. It helps you to know where you wanna go.

As for me, here are my answers to some of the questions written on p. 89 in the book, "The Path":

Imagine that it is monday morning, 9 A.M., 3 yrs from now.
Where are you?
- I am sitting in a classroom in a com class in Ateneo
What are you doing?
- I am listening intently to a really talented teacher asking him/her about stuff I don't get, and I am sitting beside my friends
What are you wearing?
- Something comfy but stylish.

It is now noon, same day. Who are you going to see? Where are you going for lunch?
- I am out with my closest friends ever for lunch somewhere along Katipunan, and dorky me is the only one bringing baon.

It is now Saturday, 6 pm.
Where are you? What are you doing? Who are you seeing?
- Somewhere, filming or working on a project for one of my classes with my extremely talented and artistic groupmates and friends.
What are you wearing?
- Something really comfortable.

So there. Now I think I'll fast forward to 10 years from now (I'll be 27). Here are some of the stuff I can imagine myself doing:

1. Making my first full-length film. It's gonna be really good! Great story, great actors (it doesn't matter if they're not too known, they are really good, and people seem to agree!) I have a really loyal and hardworking crew. There is camaraderie between cast and crew on and off set. The people I work with are just soo talented. It's tough work, but a blast!

or

2. I work for a travel magazine and I'm being sent to some beautiful far-flung island to take pictures of wildlife, the resort, the locals and the "places to go to" for a feature article. Others seem to be very impressed with my pictures, and want to go to that place too!

and/or

3. I'm happily married with no kids yet.

or

4. I have my own business related to fashion with (a) very trustworthy and hardworking business partner/s. We sell the most beautiful clothes and accessories designed by us.

So far, those are the top four things I can think of that I'd be doing 10 years from now. Will it come true? only God knows. But as one wise Albert Einstein once said, "Imagination is everything."

To-day is my birthday

2005-05-09T22:01:00.000+08:00

Today is my birthday! I woke up, went to mass, went back to sleep, woke up again, dressed for tennis, heard one of my favorite songs in the car ("Ocean Breathes Salty"), played tennis, went home, got a perm, and ate dinner at the Summer Palace in EDSA Shang.

These are the days that I really love being me, that I really love my family and that life just seems oh-so-peachy. These are the days I remember when it's 12:00 midnight, and I am not finished with my school project due the next day. When I remember on stressful days like those that jolly days like these exist, it becomes easier to bear the stress...

Today is also the birthday of Andrei... happy birthday Andrei!

Kingdom of Heaven: a movie review

2005-05-06T12:30:00.000+08:00

Last last night, I watched Ridley Scott's "Kingdom of Heaven". If I had expected a lot, I'd have said I was very disappointed, but somehow I was able to bear it.

Here are my comments:

1) Story was all over the place. Partly because of the sequencing of scenes but mostly because of not-so-clear dialogue. It was also really slow.

2) Performance by Orlando Bloom. First off, He was supposed to be from France, pero halata pa rin na English yung accent niya. Second, his acting was fairly good; however, i couldn't quite see the "fire in his eyes" in some scenes. He's a bit NR-looking sometimes, and dinadaan niya sa "squinting" (as my friend Camille said) yung "feeling".

3) Character development of Orlando Bloom's character. It was just plain weird. One moment he's a somewhat amoral character, then his father talks to him about something, then he become's a leader. No particular struggle changes his attitude. Or if there was, it wasn't made clear.

4) Hollywood-ized scenes. If Orlando Bloom's character was supposed to be "noble", why in that world would he sleep with the princess??? And to make it even more confusing, he is given the chance to "do a lot of good" by doing "a little bad". He just has to say the word and the King will have the princess' husband (the enemy) killed and he can marry the princess (whom he loves naman) and all shall be well. But he says no (of course), due to a moral dillema. But what's the point since he already slept with her!!!???

But, let's give a little credit-- here are some good points:
1) good cinematography
2) Eva Green is really pretty, and a good actress
3) I like this quote: "What man is a man who does not make the world a better place?"

Overall rating: 2.5 out of five stars.

I dedicate this post to Ysa

2005-05-06T12:12:00.000+08:00

I dedicate this post to my friend and fellow paranoid, Mrs. Ma. Ysabel Lorenza Padilla Rufino-C---- (hehe)

Thanks to Ysa, I feel better because she has shown me that I am not alone in my paranoia.

"HOMAY! IM SUPER PARANOID TOOO!!!for the past 2 weeks.. ive had a routine. i go up, close the lights.. go to the bathroom and change.. then i hear noises (or i make myself hear em) so i grab a ballpen.. open the door to my room.. open the lights.. go to my parents room to see if they're still there (alive) then i close the lights and go back to my room HOMAY for an hour i stay awake in bed MYGALLY HOMAYGAD"

footnote: that has been direct quoted from a YM conversation we just had.

Kids say the darnest things

2005-05-03T14:37:00.000+08:00

Today I played tennis and a cute little boy (I'm thinking, Grade 3? 4? let's call him Jericho for anonymity) started talking to me and my other ka-laro. This was how the conversation went (with sighs inbetween because we were running, doing forehand approach shots and backhand volleys):

Jericho: I hate my life.
Friend: Why? Aww, don't hate your life.
Jericho: Two girls like me but I don't like them.
Me (thinking): Nako, mga Grade four palang, to! Pano na kaya kapag High School!?
Jericho: She even invited me to go swimming.
Me (thinking): Wow, Assumptionista kaya yung mga girls na yan?
Jericho: I hate girls.
Me: Haha... wait some 3 or 4 more years and let's see if you still feel that way.

This leads me to my theory, among many other theories, called "The AM theory" or the "Adolescent Misogynist Theory".

The AM theory states that "Little boys who say they 'hate girls' or 'really hate girls' usually grow up being the 'charmers' in any opposite-sex interaction (i.e. soirees) during High School."

I don't exactly have any substantial proof to this argument, however, I am a full-fledged psychic, and I can tell when a little boy or a little girl will grow up to be a High School hearthob.

*sigh* yup... I do get some satisfaction from being right! Ü

Yay, It's May!

2005-05-02T17:18:00.000+08:00

Yay! It's May! I'll stop ranting now and post something happy because... Yay, it's May!

I was watching "The Incredibles" kanina, and I asked myself, "If I had any superpower, what would it be?" And i think, i would pick... the power of Jean Grey from "X-men". I think Telekinesis is cool, but I'm not too sure if I wanna read people's minds though. I think Iceman is cool also. Anyway... something less geeky...

I really love tennis again! Not that I'm getting any better... or thinner, but it's just more fun when it's less tiring and less pressure (from competing)

Yay! It's May! It's my birthday! Yay! "I am sixteen going on seventeen, I know that I'm naive..."

My sister came home from Baguio! Yay, so I don't have to be paranoid anymore. And also, I was able to sleep soundly last night without any virlix.

Right now I'm listening to: "Tumble and Fall" by Feeder.
"All this for nothing, yeah yeah yeah // Praying and hoping, fooling yourself //You know that you can give love a reason // Give love a chance"

I'm also thinking if I should join the Antioch weekend in June. One thing I realized is that the busier I am, the more time I have to pray. Middle of last schoolyear, I'd read the Gospel everyday, then late last schoolyear, mga twice or thrice a week. Now, I barely even do it. And aside from needing to pray more, I think I need an outlet to serve others or give myself or something. I guess I have no one to blame but myself. I feel like I need some kinda "enlightenment" or some kinda spiritual experience or affirmation of my faith. *sigh* I don't really know.

Ok, I'll sign off for now. I'll write again when I have something better to think of.

Paranoid Drug Dependent

2005-04-30T09:54:00.000+08:00

I am officially a paranoid drug dependent.

For the past ten days, I needed to take virlix for my rash (which healed in 3 days, actually) and like any average anti-histamine, it helps me sleep. Last night, I stopped taking it, and I so could NOT sleep!!! Nako naman!...

And to top it all off, my parents and my ate are out of town, and last night, paranoid me kept imagining sounds. Like I thought I heard my dad tapping the upstairs door saying "liz, liz", and then, half asleep, i was going to get up and open it. Then, i realized, why would my dad be tapping the door??? Ah, baka that's my uncle downstairs. Then, i realized, why would my uncle want to go upstairs when everything he needs is downstairs? Oh no, maybe there's a robber and he's asking for help! Then i thought, he would've miss called me! so i checked my phone (which was under my pillow and on silent mode so the robber wouldn't hear it if i needed to call or txt someone "help!") and there were no missed calls. After that, I remembered something that didn't really happen, and realized that i was probably dreaming when I heard the tapping on the door. Of course that time when I was actually awake, I couldn't really hear the tapping anymore.
So finally, I was awake, tossing and turning because I was too paranoid to go back to sleep.

Oh, I forgot to mention that before this happened, at some point in the night, I wanted to check the time but I was scared that there might be a robber in the room who'll see that I'm awake pala, and might stab me or something.

Here are some more proof that I am a paranoid freak of nature:
- I put some blankets on the drawer where my dad keeps the keys
- I locked my parents closet room. (after looking for the key inside the drawer)
- Then I hid the key to that room in the medicine box.
- I put pillows under my sister's blanket so kunyari someone is sleeping there.
- I fully closed all the blinds in every room so any potential robber will not be able to tell if
anyone is sleeping in that room or not.
- I was tempted to leave the aircon or an electric fan on so kunyari someone is sleeping there.

Well, there you go. When I was up at around 5 this morning, I thought, thank God! the sun is up! No robbers will attempt to steal from us when the sun is up! Thank God for the sun! Ü

*Sigh*.... I don't think I can take another night of this. Thank God cuzzins Justin and Jam are sleeping over tonight! Then I think I'll be less paranoid.

That reminds me, I forgot to put a kitchen towel in the drawer where we keep the knives. I will do that tonight!!!

Nakooo!: More Rants

2005-04-29T14:10:00.000+08:00

%$#@&! Talaga! Bakit di pa tanggal yang Scott na yan sa American Idol?! This is an outrage! Naunahan pa siya nina Anwar at Constantine! Why? Why?

Hay Nako. I suck at tennis talaga. I won itlog out of 4 games. whoopee. O well, at least I lost about 500 Calories.

Crap talaga, I feel so fat. I mean I actually FEEL fat. I gained four friggin pounds, man! Ughhhh. Kelangan ko magpa "mesotherapy" like Zsa Zsa (wait, siya nga ba yon? anyway...) As if naman I have money. :þ

Ito pa, isang nakakainis na pangyayari
Nais kong ipamahagi
Paalis ngayon sina parents tungo Australia.
Bakit nga ba ako hindi sinama?
Grrrrr!

grabacious!: a rant

2005-04-25T18:35:00.000+08:00

grabacious! (grah-bey-shuhs) I am so tired. I just played tennis for the first time in six months (maybe more) and my whole body aches and I have to do this every weekday at 10am till May 6 and *deep sigh*. I need a massage. I need to not think and just sleep and sleep and sleep and sleep and maybe, just maybe, eat inbetween waking up from sleeping. It's my only joy in life. Ü

Hello again!

2005-04-23T14:31:00.000+08:00

Okay, I know last time I posted I just put Ian Somerhalder's pic, and now, I will be talking about another boy again, but I just want anyone reading this to know that I am not completely a boy crazy fangirl or whatever you call it. Anyway, this is how it started:

I was watching CNN with my dad about two weeks ago when they were airing Prince Rainier III's funeral. When I learned he was Princess Grace Kelly's husband, I thought, cool! Ü Okay... so I started interviewing my dad if they had kids, how old were their kids and so and so and he didn't know so I decided to do something trusty Mrs. Villalon would recommend- research! (btw, i wonder how she is doing. I wonder if her belly has been growing bigger)

So anyway, I was researching and researching and to make the long story short, I found out that they had three kids (I think) One of which was Princess Caroline. And Princess Caroline had kids, too. And there he was.....

Yes, his name is Andrea

2005-04-23T14:25:00.000+08:00

Andrea Casiraghi, son of Princess Caroline of Monaco

sizzle...

2005-04-13T18:49:00.000+08:00

Boy would I wanna be stuck in an island with you...

scared shitless

2005-04-13T17:01:00.000+08:00

(note: for this post, serious & scared liza talks as shallow liza who loves to shop steps aside for a while)

My imagination is once again taking a toll on me as I think of bad scenarios that can happen to me in College. More than being scared about not making any friends, I'm scared that I might forget who I am and change into something else I never really wanted to be. What if I become some wild party girl who is out every night and forgets to study? What if I become some I-think-I'm-better-than-you chick who repels all the positively nice people around? Despite our all the palancas I've received in retreats and the Johari windows I've done in class, I sometimes still don't know who I am or what I really like. The only two words I ever hear about me is "smart" and "nice" (gee wiz, that really covers everything doesn't it? :þ)

I know as a middle child that I have been somewhat of a people-pleaser, agreeing with people a lot (although I'm trying not to be), and well, if I keep doing that... who knows? As O.A. and "Sylvia Plath-ish" as this sounds, what I think I need right now is to know myself more, and to figure out what kind of person I want to be and what kind of friends I should be hanging out with or else fall into the hands of eternal damnation.

So to start off with this new "truth-finding" mission, everytime I discover something new (or rediscover), I will write it on a post-it and post it by my bed. And this is what I've learned this past week:

I am a homebody. I love children. I love live music, and I love parties with a few close friends.

To add to that, here are some things I do wanna change in college...

1) my hairstyle (I'll let it grow muna 2 to 3 more inches, cut it off so I can donate to locks of love then get my short hair cellophaned)
2) my anti-socialness and low-confidence (I'll participate in class and be friendly in and out of class)
3) my prejudices (here is a wonderful wonderful quote by Volker Deecke I just read in jenny's multiply journal: "To appreciate other people's cultures, you have to shed your prejudices- strip yourself down to where you are just human and then build up your understanding." And that means I will make friends with and get to know homo sapiens of all kinds but hang with those that have good character - as "Assumption" as that sounds)

And well... there. Ü

what liza did

2005-04-13T16:28:00.000+08:00

Just came home from watching "Sahara" with my brothers Justin and Jam. It was okay I guess. Of course I still really wanna watch "Closer"- everyone's raving about it and I think it's showing nalang in Eastwood. I hope they don't take it out yet.

Other movies I wanna watch:
Finding Neverland
The Wedding Date
Pooh's Heffalump movie
Guess Who

Anyway, I'm so happy! I finally found some Pink Chucks I've been meaning to buy => Olympic Gold in Galle beside Folded and Hung. I also found some nice shoes in Jannylin. Gotta go back for that when I'm with my mum. Ü

Just got back from Baguio (which I got some much wanted sleep) yesterday so there's so much food. I'm surprised I'm not eating any right now. I was watching Oprah last week and I realized, I am an emotional overeater. So anyhow, I shall customize my own diet like this:

Only drink water
Nothing after 7:30
Walk at 5:30-6 everyday
No rice at night
At 4pm, my "tea hour", I will only have tea and bread or pineapple shake and bread"
Breakfast-eatlike a Queen; Lunch-eat like a princess; Dinner-eat like a pauper
And finally, have sweets only during lunch and breakfast- lessen as much as possible

And if I lose 10 pounds this summer, I will treat myself to a nice new pair of Havaianas.

a week in the life of a compulsive sleeper

2005-04-09T13:10:00.000+08:00

This was my week.

April 3 to 4, 2005

We left school early sunday morning and arrived at Gen. Nakar, Quezon to build houses for the victims of typhoons Unding, Violeta, Winnie and Yoyong. (hey! i memorize it Ü) so when we got there we had lunch and i talked to a nice old lady named Maricris. I wish I could say talking to her made me feel all warm and nice inside, but really, what can you say to someone who lost three of her seven children in such a horrid disaster? I wish I knew. I only hope and pray to God her life goes uphill from now on. After that, we started building houses- fun, but it was about to get even better.

At 6pm, we started taking a bath. From a "batis" down the road we had to carry pails of water to a cubicle built with some wood and pieces of "yero". Our curtain was the "sako" and our floor was soil- talk about living "the simple life"!

But of course, the best part was at 9 pm, during our wonderfully boring talk in the "session hall" (again, built with planks of wood and yero for our roof) it started raining...hard. And lo! and behold before we knew it, our tents were wet, our stuff were wet and our legs were covered in mud!

The good news is they had to stop our talk. The bad news was (especially for sleepy me) was that we were supposed to be in bed by 10, but it was 11 and we still had no place to sleep)
Finally, sina Ms. Jen and Ms. Priela and Sr. Jon decided that half of us would sleep in the AC bus and the others in the built GK houses. I slept in the house with my wonderful team, Team C! (facilitated by my wonderful friends Mica Gabs and Leslie) We got to bond and that was the best part! Ü I made lots of new friends with the juniors & it was cool.

For lunch the next day we had a "boodle fight". To put it simply, it was a buffet off rice with ulam on top and we had to use our hands. Did I eat? yes. Did I have a second serving? Definitely not. Well actually, just the orange juice.

So our supposed 5-day trip was cut short and we went home Monday. Aww.

That immersion didn't turn out the way it was planned, but at least we were immersed in a differnt way. (figuratively and literally)

April 5, 2005

Highlight of my day: watching my teeny-bopper show "one tree hill". Ysabel Rufino says I look like Haley but it is really NOT true.

April 6, 2005

Afternoon: went back to school for scrapbook makiiiiiinnnnnnn-- it's not even worth mentioning.

Highlight of my day: Eating at TGIF to celebrare "Jenny got into Stanford!"
I think it is majorly cool to know someone who got into Stanford, Yale, NYU, Georgetown, etc.!
haha!

April 7, 2005

Happy birthday BAMblebee!... Surprise birthday pool party at Jenny's for our jolly ol' friend Bam! We swam, pigged out on KFC, pasta and ICE CREAM and played with water balloons.
I, of course, not having my glasses on, threw a balloon at Tammy (or at least I think it was... I really couldn't see. My grade is 400-425) and majorly missed. April laughed at me.... :c...heheh

April 8, 2005

a.m.: I watched my new favorite show- "Lost" starring "Charlie" from "Party of Five" and my new favorite crush... Ian Somerhalder. Whoa!....*sizzle* (anyway, will post his pic later on)

p.m.: went to Maki's surprise (but not really) party and sang karaoke all night long! Kudos to Lacson, Yam and Carin for getting perfect 100 scores! Supah fun!

April 9, 2005

Happy 18th birthday Anabel!!! Ü

a.m.: I am writing this blog. Ok, after I have to wrap Anabel's gift, get ready for mass at 4:30. Make my speech... what else? Shit. i have to pack pa pala for Baguio tom! That means I have...3 hours before I go to mass at 4:30 in San Antonio...and I must run... ok. Constantino out. (hehehe!)